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Free joke about a prostitute.

A woman walks into an accountant's office and tells him that she needs to file her taxes.
The accountant says before we begin I need to ask a few questions.
He gets her name address, social security number etc. and then asks Whats your occupation
Im a lady of the night she says.
The accountant is somewhat taken aback and says Lets try to rephrase that.
The woman says OK Im a high class call girl.
No that still wont work Try again.
They both think for a minute then the woman says Im an elite chicken farmer.
The accountant asks What does chicken farming have to do with being a prostitute
Well I raised a thousand little peckers last year
Chicken farmer it is

Little jonny joke

Little Johnny watched his daddys car pass by the school playground and go into the woods.
Curious he followed the car and saw Daddy and Aunt Janein a passionate embrace.
Little Johnny found this so exciting that he could hardly contain himself as he ran home and started to tell his mother.
Mommy, I was at the playground and I saw Daddy's car go into the woods with Aunt Jane.
I went back to look and he was giving Aunt Jane a big kiss, and then he helped her take off her shirt.
Then Aunt Jane helped Daddy take his pants off, then Aunt Jane
At this point Mommy cut him off and said Johnny
this is such an interesting story suppose you save the rest of it for supper time.
I want to see the look on Daddy's face when you tell it tonight.
At the dinner table that evening Mommy asked little Johnny to tell his story.
Johnny started his story
I was at the playground and I saw Daddys car go into the woods with Aunt Jane.
I went back to look and he was giving Aunt Jane a big kiss, then he helped her take off her shirt.
Then Aunt Jane helped Daddy take his pants off
then Aunt Jane and Daddy started doing the same thing that Mommy and Uncle Bill used to do when Daddy was in the Army.
Mommy fainted

Free joke about ugly people

Once there was a bus of 100 ugly people.
The bus swerved off the road and they all died.
When they went to Heaven God felt bad for them and gave them each one wish.
The first guy came up and said.I wish I was handsome.
So God made him handsome.
So next a woman came up and said I wish I was beautiful.
So God made her beautiful.
They came up one by one wishing to be beautiful and handsome.
Meanwhile the guy in the back is laughing hysterically.
God asks him what is so funny.
Oh nothing he says.
When his turn arises God says, Okay whats your wish
He replies thats easy make em all ugly again.

Viagra joke

Viagra is now available in liquid form. Pfizer Drug officials today announced the release of the wonder drug, Viagra, in a new, easy-to-take liquid form. It is sold under the generic name "Mydixadud". Now, when men come home from work in the evening they can pour themselves a stiff one